A Year in REVIEWS

I dug up a couple of movie reviews that I wrote awhile back. Since I can't seem to muster up the courage to create a brand new post, I though I'd at least give you, my fans, a taste of my professional writing style. Prepare to be bored to tears with the longest post of my life:

• Cool as Ice - Movie Review
• Pan's Labyrinth - Movie Review

And so you all know, I got A's on both of these. A+ even. Enjoy...or skim...or enjoy while skimming. It's up to you, really.

Cool as Ice Film Review

The film “Cool as Ice” was written by David Stenn, produced by Carolyn Pfeiffer and Lionel Wigram, and directed by David Kellogg. The original music score was written by Stanley Clark and costumer designer was Ingrid Ferrin. Director of photography was Janusz Kaminski who later went on to work with Steven Spielberg in Schindler’s List in 1993 and has photographed all of his movies since. Cast included Robert Van Winkle AKA Vanilla Ice as John “Johnny” Van Owen, Kristin Minter as Kathy Winslow, and Michael Gross as Gordon Winslow, Kathy’s father.

During the opening credits, we are favored to a music video starring Johnny, in which he is established as a hard core rap artist, most likely very popular in his time. From the clothing and style of music, the theme is set right away to take place sometime in the early 1990’s. Johnny’s lifestyle and attitude are further developed as one of the female dancers from the music video approaches him and gives him her number. The story then begins as Johnny and his crew, consisting of Jazz, Sir D and Princess, hop on their motorbikes and hit the road.

During their road trip, they come upon a small rural town and Johnny notices his next victim: a girl riding her horse in a field parallel to the road. He miraculously jumps the fence surrounding the field on his motorcycle with no ramp, and lands directly in front of the running horse. This scares the horse, tossing the girl to the ground. After some kind words to each other, Johnny and his crew take off. Thus we can get a feel for Johnny’s character in the opening two scenes of the film.

After a short ride into town, Jazz’s motorcycle breaks down and the gang is forced to stop for a few days at a local garage while the two nutty owners, Mae and Roscoe, fix the bike. Fortunately for Johnny, this short delay gives him time to meet the girl riding horseback, since, as it turns out, she lives a few houses down the street from the shop.

The story moves on to the girl. In the few scenes following the motorcycle break down, we learn that the girl’s name is Kathy Winslow. She is a 4.0 student who has made her family very proud. She seems to be in a failing relationship with her boyfriend, Nick, and thus she is very drawn to Johnny and his carefree lifestyle. Her mom and dad, unbeknownst to Kathy, have been on the witness protection program her entire life.

The plot thickens as two thugs from Mr. Winslow’s past show up at their door and demand a sum of money within 24 hours. After two days, these thugs get impatient which causes them to kidnap Kathy’s little brother, Tommy.

Meanwhile, Kathy and Johnny seem to be getting along. After breaking into her room and waking her up early in the morning by stuffing an ice cube in her mouth, they go on what seems to be an all day, extravagant date, where they talk and discuss life from Johnny’s point of view. Seeing how careless and free he seems, Kathy falls deeply in love with him. Mr. Winslow is not happy about this and forbids her to see him again; he believes Johnny to be in cahoots with the two thugs.

As luck would have it, Johnny shows up to say good bye just after Kathy’s brother was kidnapped, notices a tape on the doorstep and hands it to the dad as he is kicked off the property. The tape turns out to be a message from the kidnappers demanding a large sum of money in exchange for the safety of the boy. Kathy, unwilling to call the police for help, and so in love with Johnny, refuses to believe he had any part in the whole charade, steals the tape and runs out of the house. She runs to the garage where Johnny and his crew are “keeping it real” and has Johnny listen to the tape. Johnny, being the detective that he is, analyzes the tape and figures out where the kidnappers took Kathy’s brother. Together with his gang, Vanilla and Kathy, ride to the kidnappers’ hideout, beat up the bad guys, and save Tommy.

The movie ends as Mr. Winslow apologizes to the overrated rap artist and watches as he drives away with his daughter, jumping her boyfriend Nick’s car, again with no ramp, as they ride away happy. We are then favored to another music video, this time with Kathy watching her new found love perform.

The two things to point out are the music and clothing. Costume designer Ingrid Ferrin does a very good job at depicting to exact detail everything about the early 90’s we only wish we could forget. Fluorescent colored, mismatching clothes, funky hair designs, and extreme baggy pants give this movie an unmistakable 1990 feel; furthermore, it gives Johnny a care-free, doesn’t-give-a-damn attitute right from the beginning. Ferrin also creates a perfect stereotype of the goody-goody straight-A student, and her not-so-friendly, jock boyfriend. She wears very modest clothes, seen in a white dress at parties signifying her purity, and he wears jeans with polo tucked-in and a letterman’s jacket. Composer Stanley Clarke does nothing less than create the same atmosphere through music and sounds that were very popular during this time period.

The film is meant to be a remake of classic “Rebel Without a Cause” starring James Dean. The story is told to show the differences between the careless Johnny and Kathy with her perfect life, and how the two coincide and attract one another. There is no doubt that director David Kellogg meant to teach the message to not judge a book by it’s cover. The rebellious Johnny is negatively judged by his clothing and lifestyle by everyone he meets, yet turns out to be the hero. Moreover, the film strongly depicts life in the 1990’s thus leaving the impression that it was meant to do so.

“Cool as Ice” is at best a film for nostalgic purposes only. It was not meant to be a comedy, yet it should only be watched by those willing to laugh at the horrible screenplay and acting to match. Though it is not rated the worst film of all time, it is considered to be in the bottom 5, not even worthy of the title cult classic.

Pan’s Labyrinth (AKA El Laberinto del Fauno) Film Review

The film Pan’s Labyrinth was written, produced and directed by genius Guillermo del Toro, a very successful director whose outstanding work includes The Orphanage, Hellboy and Hellboy 2. Other producers include Alfonso Cuarón, Bertha Navarro, Frida Torresblanco, and Alvaro Augustin. The original musical score was written by Javier Navarrete, the director of photography was Guillermo Navarro and the production designer was Eugenio Cabballero. Cast includes Ivana Baquero as Ofelia/Princess Moanna, Sergi López i as Captain Vida/Ofelia’s step father, Doug Jones as The Faun, Maribel Verdú as Mercedes and Ariadna Gil as Carmen, Ofelia’s mother.

From the very beginning of the film, noting the color scheme to the music, the overall feel of an imaginative, somewhat depressing story is set. The movie begins by telling the story of an old fable about a princess long ago that escaped from her magical world and lost all memory of who she was and from whence she came. The story goes that the princess would one day return.

We then meet Ofelia and her mother, Carmen, as they are riding in a car. The theme is set to take place in 1944 Spain, just after the Spanish civil war, and anyone who knows about the history of Spain will know that Franco is in power. This becomes important for particular character development. Carmen is a bit ill from her pregnancy, thus she asks the driver to stop the car. This gives Ofelia a chance to explore and allows for del Toro to begin to show that the magical world is intermingled with our real world. They are somewhere in the woods traveling to what we will find to be a camp/house where Capitan Vida and his men are staying.

Right away, Ofelia begins to see tid bits of a magical world as she meets a fairy in the woods as she explores. Her mother calls her to come; it is interesting the Carmen completely ignores her daughter when she tries to explain about having seen a fairy. This leads us to wonder if she the magical world really exists, or only exists in Ofelia’s imagination, and this theme is carried on through the entire film.

Upon arriving to the camp, we understand right away the type of man Capitan Vida is. As the car pulls up, he checks his watch and mumbles, “15 minutes late…” They are shown to their rooms as Carmen is put in a wheelchair and a doctor is asked to check on her immediately. As Ofelia and her mother lie in bed, we get a feel for the love that the mother has for her daughter and is only concerned for her well-being.

That night, the fairy the Ofelia met in the woods comes to her, bids her to follow, and she sneaks out to do so. She comes upon a maze in the forest with some old statues, follows the fairy to the center of the labyrinth where she meets the faun. It is impressive that she doesn’t seem to fear it, but walks up to it and begins talking to it. The faun repeatedly calls her “your majesty,” “princess,” etc. He gives her a book in which all the pages are blank and tells her that she has some tasks to perform if she wants to return to her true land.

Meanwhile, we begin to understand the reason the captain and his men are in the woods, and better our understanding of the captain himself. He is called out to talk to some men that are believed to be rebels that have been hiding in the woods and in a brutal way kills them both before learning that they were only out hunting for food. He is shown to be arrogant, angry at the world and somewhat sadistic, perfect for any captain of Franco’s army in Franco’s Spain; just like Franco himself.

The next day, Ofelia hides herself in a room and opens the book given to her by the faun. Suddenly, as if magically, there begins to appear drawings and writing on the once blank pages of the book; these tell her what tasks she is to perform. She trusts the housekeeper, Mercedes, to some of this information. Mercedes is reluctantly trusted by the captain, though we learn later that she is helping the rebels hidden in the woods by giving them medicine and access to the captains stores (food, medicine, supplies).

The real life story progresses as the rebels are found by the captain and his men; a battle ensues and they capture one of them alive. He is tortured by the sadistic captain to answer questions on the whereabouts of those who escaped the battle. He finds nothing out from the rebel as he refuses to talk, but learns that the doctor is also helping the rebels as he injects the rebel with a drug to end his suffering. Ofelia’s magical story progresses as she performs the tasks that she is told to do.

Ofelia’s mother soon gives birth, but due to the complications of the pregnancy (and partially to the fact that medical treatments hadn’t progressed too far), Carmen dies, leaving the son to the captain and Ofelia alone. Mercedes intends to rescue both Ofelia and her new little brother, but is discovered by the captain and has to flee. Ofelia’s final task is to bring the newborn to the faun. She manages to do this by poisoning the captain, taking the baby and running to the woods. Captian Vida weakly follows her and finds her in the center of the labyrinth; she is speaking with the faun yet it appears to him that she is alone, he can’t see the faun.

At this point, the faun, standing above what appears to be an alter, demands a sacrifice of innocent blood, meaning that of Ofelia’s brother. She refuses to hand him over, turns to leave and is shot by the captain. As she falls to the ground, he takes the baby and runs out of the labyrinth to find the group of rebels, led by Mercedes, waiting for him. They take the baby and do not spare the life of Captain Vida.

Back inside the labyrinth, as Ofelia’s body falls to the ground, blood falls onto the alter. She then appears to wake up, having been transported back to her own magical land, where her real father, her mother Carmen, and the faun are there waiting for her. The faun explains that she had passed her final task, sacrificing her life for that of another, and was permitted to enter back into her world from whence she had escaped.

As noted earlier, the story is very depressing. Del Toro does an excellent job at mixing the two stories together flawlessly. Director of photography Javier Navarrete does nothing less than del Toro by perfectly setting the atmosphere of the movie, and complements del Toro’s integration of the two worlds by creating a flawless transition between the magical and real worlds. Production designer Eugenio Cabballero helps also to create a perfect atmosphere by working with Navarrete, Toro, and of course the costume designers, to help create this atmospheric experience as well as depict life, clotihng and customs of Franco’s Spain.

Del Toro is a genius in the way he writes and directs all of his films. At the end of the film, we are still unsure whether Ofelia’s world was completely in her head, maybe meant to be her way of escaping the war and terrible things that were taking place around her, or if the magical world actually existed. There is even some symbolism in the movie referencing the magical world and part of the story to theology, as she once left home, had certain tasks to perform, and selflessly sacrifice her own life to return home to her true father.

This movie won numerous awards, including Best Art Direction, Best Cinematography, Best Foreign Language Film, Best Makeup, Best Original Score and Best Original Screenplay in the academy awards of 2007, and many other awards in all classes of film review. The soundtrack was outstanding, and its perfect integration into the theme of the movie, along with its powerful tones almost brings a tear to the eye. The movie was beautiful, and I would recommend that everyone that can handle a small bit of bloody violence watch it. It leaves you thinking and pondering life, different ways we escape reality, as well as theological ideas that tend to motivate and keep many going.