I Took That Promise. Will You?

I'll be honest with you guys for a few moments. It may even be presumed that I will be completely honest for the remainder of this post. A few months ago, I may have bragged about losing a little weight. In fact, last year I lost a lot of weight. It felt good.

Here's where the honesty kicks in: I had a hard time regulating my diet shortly after moving to Columbia. Let's just say that I may have put on a few of those pounds I had lost. I told myself over and over and over and over again that I was going to get back on the healthy kick, to get back to the very strict diet I kept myself on. I told myself that in November. Then again in December. Near January 1st, I said, "Self, you need to get back on the healthy kick from whence you came. Starting January 1st."

"That ought to do it," I thought back.

Another month and a week passed by. I could see my sister's wedding in the forthright future, realizing without doubt that forthright is not the adjective I was seeking to use in this sentence. In feigning brains, sometimes you have to take one for the team and risk looking awkwardly stupid. This is getting awkwardly stupid.

"Well, self, what are you going to do?" I asked myself on the morning of February 4th. "You need to find some motivation!"

Where did I turn? The interweb. To be honest (still), I didn't look for any motivation on the interweb. I went to fb and Twitter, back to fb, checked out a few blogs, thought about writing one (which frequently happens), didn't write one (which occurs with nearly the same frequency), and finally ended up here. Go there and read the post, unless you already have or are the author. You will most likely begin to realize what a curious, almost supernaturalistic (which is a word, according to the lack of squiggly red beneath it) coincidence it was. I took that promise.

Two more weeks passed by.

"Dimwit! (I had ceased referring to myself as self and went with something a little more provocative and invasive. Again two adjectives completely unrelated to the noun they modify.) You big dumb. Get your face into gear! [slant face]" This inner-monologue took place today about 4:13 pm (16:13) upon entering the local Hyvee to make some food purchases. Here is what I bought (keep in mind that I had previously thrown almost everything out in my ice box as it had all gone bad, which means only one thing. Fast food.):

• Frozen brocoli
• Frozen spinach
• High-fiber oatmeal
• Extra fiber wheat bread
• Organic almond milk
• Fresh from the farm skim milk
• Fat free yogurts
• Shredded cheese (eek!)
• Baby carrots
• Bananas
• Apples
• Potatoes
• Grapes
• Celery
• Frozen string and wax beans with carrots

Nothing too exciting. I have some whole wheat pasta in the cupboard. I have some almond butter in the other cupboard. I just got deja vu.

"That's not enough. If you're going back on the WJO (Winter June Oaktree, name modified for coolness) diet, you also need to get your exercise in."

Went running. First time in 2 (five) months. I'm dead. It feels good.

So there it is, folks. The [re]start of the [re]new[ed] me. Not sure what I meant by that sentence or what to say to end this post. How about this?

Stop.